Lest start with the end in mind:
what kind of adult do you want your kids to grow into? And what kind parent and person do you want to look back on?
Often we parent from our short term goal: peace, quiet and happy kids in the here and now. Often this is to avoid battles, think we do them a favour but this is misplaced love.
Love is when we are not afraid to set rules, give responsibilities and allowing our kids to get it wrong ...